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| Prandial Pleasures |
| FT Magazine, 22 January 2005 |
It might only be a whisper away from Glasgow’s West End proper, but it can seem nearer the end of the world, as you head for the motorway out. But amongst the shuttered newspaper shops, tanning salons, bric-a-brac stores, and traffic lights, there is a tiny, but very shiny pearl. At first it is deceptive – the bars on the window outside may, at first pass, seem to have a purely functional remit – but in fact, closer examination realises that they are a sculpture in wrought iron, with fish and shells coasting over the windows rather charmingly. Two Fat Ladies occupies the sliver of space that is a ground floor tenement flat. The chef cooks at the front, looking onto the road, and the washing up is done at the back. Quite how they manage to cook for 26 people at a time is beyond me. Dining is done under the large eyes of a couple of naked plump goddesses, in an enormous painting hoisted upon the wall. And were they alive, they’d have to stay up there. Space is tight. I came here before my major diet: alas, the first time I dined here, I had to dodge sideways between tables and remember not to breathe too deeply. Returning minus several kilos, I was more comfortable – at least before the puddings. Diehard carnivores and vegetarians are catered for, but this is definitively a seafood restaurant and it performs a small menu exquisitely. I started with miniature roasted vegetable tartlets to tease, followed by prawns in chilli butter–fabulous, with a consort of vegetables, seasonal and perfect – emerald fresh broccoli with bite, glistening and crunchy green beans… this place makes you feel better about all kinds of things. Including diets. I managed to quash all calorie controlled efforts with the prodigious ‘Two Fats’ dessert –which comes with two spoons and comprises all desserts on the menu (three varieties of crème brulee, chocolate mousse, sticky toffee pudding and Pavlova). As I felt my waist expanding, I could not help but notice Two Ladies looking down on me who, no matter how I looked at them, were definitely still fatter than I was. Two Fat Ladies |